Free · Online · Guided peer group

Narcissistic relationship abuse support group

For survivors of narcissistic relationship abuse: a narcissistic husband, wife, boyfriend, girlfriend or partner. If you've lived through gaslighting, love bombing, the silent treatment, trauma bonding, or the confusion of leaving and going no contact, you're not alone and you're not crazy. Talk with people who understand narcissistic abuse in relationships, and rebuild trust in yourself. If you're in danger right now, call 911. For confidential help and safety planning, the National Domestic Violence Hotline is open 24/7: call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or text START to 88788. This is a guided peer group: there's no host, just people who get it, talking together, with the Heal Kinder guide to welcome everyone and offer talking points. Cameras stay on, so everyone can see who they're talking with; your microphone is your choice. Please be kind, and use Report if anyone makes the room feel unsafe.

Groups you can join

Free, online, and open to you. Times are in your own time zone.

Narcissistic abuseThursdays · 9:00am

Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers

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Narcissistic abuseSaturdays · 10:00am

Children of Narcissistic Mothers

The damage done to a child from a narcissistic parent is tremendous, the foundations of a human being have been destroyed by the Narcissistic parent in those fundamental years. A mother wound, a father wound or both were created within you and now you have to unpack all your baggage and sort through it and throw away what no longer serves you, the coping mechanisms that kept you safe as a child now keep you prisoner as an adult. Learning to undo and build up what you were never taught is a tough job and sometimes it doesn't feel fair that the healing is all up to you when none of it was your fault. "I'm 36 now and a lot of people think that by 36 you should stop blaming all your problems on your parents, well riddle me this, if you were in a building with a messed up foundation, would you feel safer on the 36th floor?" - GianMarco Soresi A little humor that hits home and might bring a smile to your face.

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Connection groupDaily · 12:00pm

Open support circle

A free online support group for anyone, whatever you're going through. No topic to fit into: come with something big, something small, or just wanting to be around people who understand. Talk if you'd like to, or just listen. If you're thinking about suicide or are worried about staying safe, call or text 988 (the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline) any time, or call 911. In the UK, call Samaritans on 116 123. This is a guided peer group: there's no host, just people who get it, talking together, with the Heal Kinder guide to welcome everyone and offer talking points. Cameras stay on, so everyone can see who they're talking with; your microphone is your choice. Please be kind, and use Report if anyone makes the room feel unsafe.

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Focus session · body doublingMondays · 10:00am

Monday body doubling focus session

Get something done alongside other people. Body doubling helps many people, especially with ADHD, start and stick with the things that are hard to do alone: work, study, emails, tidying, a form you've been putting off. How it works: say in the chat what you're working on, then we all get on with our own thing together, with a shared timer: 25 minutes of focus, a 5-minute break, 20 more minutes, then a quick check-in on how it went. Your mic starts off and your camera is your choice. Nobody has to talk. Come in any time during the hour.

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Could you start a narcissistic abuse group?

If you've been through narcissistic abuse yourself, you could be the one who opens this space. People searching for support with narcissistic abuse are looking for exactly this: others who understand. A group you start, even once a week, could mean a great deal to them, and they'd be grateful you did.

Hosting is free and simple, you don't need any training to begin (there's a short host course if you'd like it), and you can invite friends who are going through it too.

Join free to start one Invite a friend who needs it

Everyone joins a group as a member first, so you know how they feel from the inside.

Common signs of narcissistic abuse

For information only, not for diagnosing. These are common experiences, not a diagnosis of you or of anyone else. Only a qualified mental health professional can diagnose a personality disorder such as NPD, and only by assessing that person themselves. If this sounds familiar, a counsellor or an abuse support service can help you make sense of what you've been through.

What people who've been through it often describe, in a relationship, family or workplace:

Feeling like you're always walking on eggshells around them
Doubting your own memory or judgement after being told things didn't happen the way you remember (gaslighting)
Lots of attention and praise at first, then criticism and put-downs
Feeling that everything is your fault, and apologising all the time
Being cut off from friends and family, bit by bit
The silent treatment, or affection taken away as a punishment
Your needs and feelings being dismissed, while theirs always come first
Your money, phone or time being watched or controlled
Feeling anxious, numb, or not like yourself any more
Being drawn back in by promises that things will change

If you don't feel safe, free, confidential help is there any time: in the US, the National Domestic Violence Hotline on 1-800-799-7233; in the UK, the National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 2000 247. If you're in danger, call 911 (US) or 999 (UK).